Good Morning,
The baby Jesus and 7 Christmas Trees are missing from the manger.
If anyone has any information please contact Public Safety X2224.

Thank you

Thank You Fuego (via James) for this important notice. If you or anyone you know has seen Baby Jesus and the 7 Christmas Trees, tell them Sub Pop would like to sign them.

Categories: congrats grad, identity theft, jews, terrorist attacks
1 Comment »

So you know when you’re on the metro and this old bitch who looks like a “If They Mated” of your middle school guidance counselor and Lucille Bluth keeps looking at you in disgust and you’re all like “what the fuck is her problem? Maybe it’s the botox”? And then you brush it off because fuck that bitch right? And so then you happen to look down at your feet only to realize that you have a long, fresh strand of drool on your sweatshirt?

Hi, I’m 4.

Categories: idgi, congrats grad, Liz
9 Comments »

Idaho Man Blames Wild Sex for Car Crash

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

MOSCOW, Idaho — A 22-year-old carnival worker blames two friends having sexual intercourse in the back seat of his car for an accident in which his Chevrolet S-10 Blazer struck a telephone pole.

Joshua D. Frank, who is living in a trailer parked on the Latah County Fairgrounds, pleaded guilty Monday to a misdemeanor charge of failing to notify a police officer of a traffic accident. That’s after he left the vehicle at the site of the mishap. He was fined $188.

Frank told Moscow Police Department officers that he was driving the vehicle near downtown early Saturday while a man and woman were having sex in the rear of the vehicle.

According to a probable cause affidavit, Frank told authorities that the actions of the pair in the back caused the Blazer, which “was top heavy anyway,” to become “tippy” and lose control.

Frank left the accident scene with a minor head wound and returned to his trailer.

The other two occupants of the vehicle were treated for injuries, according to the affidavit, though further information on their condition wasn’t available.

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So much is wrong with this article: dude is a Carnie, the repeated mention of his trailer to remind you just how trashy he is, and other trash-tasticness. My favorite part, though, is when Mr. Frank refers to his car as being “top heavy”. Throw Some D’s?

The reason I’m writing this post, though, is to officially declare Idaho as the winner of Sexiest State 2007. First Larry Craig, now this? Congratulations, Idaho. You have truly earned it.

Categories: congrats grad, foot tap, it's just a fact, cowboy hats, great use of the english language, Liz
6 Comments »